I need this blog more than anyone needs to read it, I need to vent, I need therapy every now and then, I need to do this more...I think it's good for me!!
Diabetes still sucks, it always will!! I still cry from time to time, when I get hit hard by something small!! Like watching my daughter count carbs and patiently wait at the kitchen table while I weigh and measure so that she can have her breakfast. Like watching Max hand Olivia her kit and say "sugar", how this disease is embedded in my family! Like watching her friends come over to play and just grab food out of our pantry and eating it, with no thoughts of blood sugar and insulin. Looking at your child sway as she's climbing out of a pool, and running like a crazy women to get to her, all the while hoping that Max won't drown while I'm away.
Sometimes I stop and dream all the what if's, but that only hurts in a nagging deep pain kind of way. What if this never happened to her to us, I would take my healthy children for granted, I wouldn't be on my knees thanking God every day for what I have. I know when a cure is found, I will fall to my knees and thank God. I wish I realized what a blessing it was before it was taken away. I'm very thankful for the health of my boys, but I wait on eggshells praying that also won't be taken away.
We are waiting on our Omnipod, how I hope this will be the beginning of a easier life for my Livy!!
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